today as we get ready to celebrate the 3rd sunday of advent, this Day where the rose colored vestments, not the rose colored glasses, are worn and we are invited to rejoice, I came across some marriage advise.
this advise comes from a poet and novelist who has been married to the same woman for 50 years. He has this to say about marriage:
"Marriage is survived just on the basis of ordinary etiquette, day in and day out. Also cooking together helps a lot. I've seen all these marriages that failed. Those people are always hollering at each other. That doesn't work. Do you remember the '70s, they had all these 'empowering' groups where you tell everybody everything? That doesn't work in a marriage either. That's stupid."
Just thought i might share. I try to get couples to understand this in marriage prep but most of them insist that their way is best, so they keep hollering and nagging and then boom it all falls apart and they wonder why.
Ordinary etiquette shows that no body likes nagging and no body likes yelling. Perhaps it is time to try something new, i suggest listening and talking, in that order. Isn't that what makes friendship happen.
In the words of the Sirach in today's first reading, "Blessed is he who shall have seen you and who falls asleep in your friendship." Fall asleep in friendship. A nice picture of marriage.
Perhaps Jim Harrisson has found something, besides, 50 years is tried and true.
1 comment:
Amen
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